July 29th, 2003

Private Property

I've never been that private of a person. I'm usually open and free with anyone and everyone. I enjoy large gathers, loud music, cute girls, and cool guys. Somehow, I've always managed to keep this trend going.

Before I continue, let me state that I'm not bragging, just stating honest truth. Things don't happen that often unless I start them. I tend to be that spark that lights the fire of an adventure. Now, I'm not complaining about that. In fact I LOVE that aspect. What I don't love however, is that some people have lost all creative-ness and free-will because of it. They're always expecting me to come up with something to do or some way to entertain. Most the time I'm happy to oblige, but their are those rare occassion I don't feel up to it.

Point in case: I am in Pulaski at my parents house right now dog-sitting/house-sitting. I was going to be here alone for 4 days straight so I elected to call nathan to see if he could come up and stay with me. He said sure, but he doesn't have a car so someone would have to bring him halfway to Abingdon so that I could meet him there. Again, no problem. So, us being the guys that we are, have 3 ladies attend with us, basically on spur of the moment. It wasn't a planned ordeal, it wasn't a conspiracy to keep people from showing up, it wasn't us tryin' to avoid anyone. It was just good-timing I suppose. We went to abingdon, saw a movie, had some food, and then parted our seperate ways. The ladies back to BSG and nate and I back up here to pulaski. When I get back i find a few messages from different people trying to put guilt trips on me for not inviting them to the movies and such. I just couldn't believe it.

At first I was a lil' annoyed, but I got over that. Now, I'm just sitting back wondering when I became the center of everyone's universe. I don't like it, never asked for it, and much prefer the shadows; watching from afar.

My thoughts now? Don't rely on anyone else to determine what you want. Use the helpful hands out reached to you when necessary. Don't let pride get in your way of retrieving the common good. And for God sake, use your imagination. Everyday is an adventure, you don't need someone else to be the hero of your story, that's what YOU'RE there for.
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